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Protecting Yourself From Stalkers

This is a compilation of suggestions gathered from many victims of stalkers, law enforcement agencies, security consultants and other experts in this field. Each suggestion should be considered on its own merits and on the anticipated benefit you may derive, vs. the potential negative effect each could bring about.

  • Ignore the individual
  • Be clear and unambiguous that the relationship is over, or that you do not desire a relationship
  • Do not give reasons for break up
  • Do not let the stalker see your concern
  • Cut off all contact with the stalker
  • Answering Machines should not say “Not at Home” also use a voice other than your own.
  • Use caller ID or contact telephone company
  • Obtain an unlisted phone number
  • Make sure house address is clearly marked and that it is visible from the street, so police and rescue personnel can respond easily
  • Get a dog
  • Do not allow strangers in your house
  • Keep address and schedule secret
  • Inquire about laws concerning your situation
  • Notify authorities every time stalker bothers you and keep copies of the reports
  • Treat all threats as legitimate and call police every time the stalker shows up
  • Press charges every time & have a term of his bond be that he can’t contact you
  • Ask for periodic police drive-bys
  • Obtain a restraining order
  • Don’t ask the police to go and just visit the stalker, for if the police don’t arrest him, the stalker could feel that his target’s best defense was useless.
  • Go public
  • Send a registered letter telling person to stop; this can be sent from your attorney
  • Photograph the stalker or video tape the stalker and things that he does
  • Keep a log of stalking activities and have witnesses to testify
  • Keep all written materials received from the suspect
  • Document all medical reports of physical abuse
  • Take photos of wounds, bruises and acts of vandalism
  • Join a support group
  • Vary your routine
  • Limit time spent walking alone or along the same route
  • Notify neighbors and coworkers about the situation and give them a photo of the stalker and tell them to notify you if they see him
  • If you need to, get an unlisted phone number for day to day business, and leave an answering machine on your listed or known phone number to let the unwanted person leave their messages
  • Have coworkers screen calls and visitors
  • Have coworkers check with each other to see if someone is calling them all
  • Alert security personnel at work
  • Stay in public areas and try not to travel alone
  • Always carry your cell phone
  • Children should be accompanied to the bus or to school
  • Do not park in garages that require the keys to your car
  • Lock car door when traveling and be aware of other cars
  • Rent a mailbox from a private service
  • Ask for a free home security check-up
  • Lock fuse box, car, garage, trim hedges by windows
  • Equip gas tank with a lock and the hood release should be inside the car
  • Install deadbolts; if all the keys can not be accounted for change the locks
  • Install outside lighting (motion detectors)
  • Secure car and house at all times and install alarms in both
  • If you move, do not leave a paper trail
  • If the situation is drastic consider changing jobs or Hiring a security guard
  • Have a contingency plan that includes: 
(a) quick access to important phone numbers
(b) packed suitcase 
(c) reserved money (d) alert critical people to situation and plan
  • Take legal action other than a temporary restraining order (TRO)
 

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